RELATIONSHIPS: Building Your Love Part 1 | Great Health Guide
RELATIONSHIPS: Building Your Love Part 1

RELATIONSHIPS: Building Your Love Part 1

‘Building Your Love Part 1’ by Martin Gladman published in Great Health Guide (Oct 2016). There are many of us that have longed and lusted over love, but how many of us have taken responsibility for living it? The ability to build and live love is something that is possible for every single human being. Discover how to build, nurture the relationship with yourself and others through this two part series by Martin today.
Read other Relationship articles on Great Health Guide, a hub of expert-inspired resources empowering busy women to embody health beyond image … purpose beyond measure.

Relationships: Building Your Love Part 1

written by Martin Gladman

There are many of us that have longed and lusted over love, but how many of us have taken responsibility for living it? Surely our sadness or misery is because the right person hasn’t come our way and not because of what we’re choosing, right? Wrong! The ability to build and live love is something that is possible for every single human being by the very nature of them being born; how much we get to feel that each and every day though, is completely up to us, as it’s based on what we choose and what we build over time. The following is Part 1 in our two-part series on Building Your Love and how you can practically start building your love right now. So here are tips one to five – time to get off the misery-go-round and start to truly re-empower ourselves with our own love.

1. Recognise that love is not something that relies on or requires another. 

How many minutes, hours, days, weeks, months or even years have we spent longing for that one person to bring us love when we in fact could have been choosing it and building it for ourselves all along? Many of us make the error in thinking that love is something that is only possible when we’re with another but this is not true. Love is with us in every single moment of the day, it’s just up to us to choose it, breath it and live it. So why waste time waiting for love when we can connect right now to it and choose to make our next move loving? And what would happen if we did the same for the move after that and the one after that and the one after that? We would quickly see that it is not love that gives up on us, but we who give up on it. 

2. Make it practical, pay attention to the details.

It’s easy to say the words ‘I love myself’ but when we look into the details of that statement, how truthful is it? It’s like saying we have a clean house that looks sparkling and organised on the surface, but when you start to get into the cupboards and drawers we see that it’s not so clean after all. Love is found in the details, in the smallest of smallest things we do. From how we put down our toothbrush to how we place our head on the pillows. If we bring all of our love to every part of what we do, with nothing left out or considered lesser, very soon all the little things add up, resulting in us living a life of love and not just pretending to.

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3. Make it about your body first.

Everything we do, we do in our bodies. Our bodies are the vehicles which carries us through our days and is the thing in which we experience life in. Be it cooking, cleaning, sleeping, eating, breathing, reading or making love, all of it happens because of our bodies. When we focus on deeply nurturing and loving our bodies, our bodies do something amazing, they respond to it, as do we. Whether it be taking the time to gently massage some cream into your body after a shower, getting regular and consistent early night’s sleep or eating supportive and healthy foods, everything you do to your body, you do to you. So if we bring all our love to our bodies, guess who benefits? You do and then in turn, we all do.

4. Keep it simple.

Often when we think about loving ourselves we can get stuck thinking that it needs to be something big and grand when it in fact can be simple. Sure baths and weekends away are lovely but you need to connect to what can you do right now. Are you sitting in a way that is comfortable and supportive to the body? Are you warm? Have you had enough water? Have you been outside for a walk? Every little thing we do in our days can either come from a deep love and care for ourselves or from a place that is everything but that. So if you were to keep it simple and choose to be love right now, what would that look like? What would you choose?

5. Express love whenever you can.

Love is not something that is meant to be kept to ourselves, it’s meant to be shared. Now I don’t mean in a preachy, weird kind of imposing way, but simply expressed and given air as opposed to locked up and hidden away. If you appreciate the way your boss greets you in the morning, let them know how much it means to you. If you enjoy the way your friends or family members laugh, then let them know how joyful it is for you. If you love the way your partner makes the bed each day, let them know how much it supports you. Let people know how much you love and appreciate them and take the time to do the same for you. Expression is great medicine for the body.

Making changes can seem hard at first, but if we keep choosing to move forward and love ourselves through any challenges that may arise, at the end of it, we get to enjoy the fact that we didn’t give up on ourselves and bask in the glory of what we truly and honestly deserve.  So, get to it!

Look out for the next round of tips in November’s edition of GHGTM, but in the meantime, enjoy building your love.

Author of this article:
Martin Gladman is a social worker, counsellor, teacher and life coach working out of Melbourne. Victoria. Martin has had the pleasure of supporting people of all ages, backgrounds and genders to work through the many challenges which can prevent them from living truly joyful and vital lives. Martin can be contacted through his website.

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Join the discussion 2 Comments

  • Peta Lehane says:

    What a great article by Martin Gladman! I love reading anything and everything he writes yet this one is so accessible and applicable. I love how he reminds us of our innate love, that it’s there for the choosing not just in the big things with others but in the little things with ourselves….just when you think you’re all alone, you stop and feel your movements as you pick up a toothbrush, and hey presto! Love is there with you, inside you. Building love has never felt so easy. Great and truly useful tips…can’t wait for part 2. Thank you for bringing this!

    • Martin Gladman says:

      Thank you very much Peta. Who’s got the love? You’ve got the love – and as you say, it’s as easy as that. Enjoy.

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