MINDSET: Change – Forgive & Forget? | Great Health Guide
MINDSET: Change – Forgive & Forget?

MINDSET: Change – Forgive & Forget?

‘Change: Forgive & Forget’ by Kelly Swingler published in Great Health Guide (Nov 2016). Do you cope well with change? Have you had a difficult decision handed to you at work? Or perhaps you’re going through tough relationship problems? Change is happening all the time. Find out from Kelly how to accept change & move forward with your life.
Read other Mindset articles on Great Health Guide, a hub of expert-inspired resources empowering busy women to embody health beyond image … purpose beyond measure.

MINDSET: Change – Forgive & Forget?

written by Kelly Swingler

We are told ‘Change is hard’. But is it the process of change or the emotional side of change that we struggle to cope with the most? You’ve been with your company for 10 years, you’ve secured a promotion or two, you’ve always been graded highly in your performance reviews and then you get called into a meeting, ‘We need to let you go’. 

What? You didn’t see that coming. Nobody said the business was in trouble, is it something you said or something you did? No! 

‘How can this possibly be happening to me?’ If you manage to hold back the tears until you get out of the door you are doing well, but your emotions are now in full swing. The tears, the fears, all those broken promises, the negativity that creeps in as you turn from upset to hatred as they surely could have chosen someone else to go!

If you secure your dream job after you leave, you may say it was the best thing ever, but if you struggle to find a new job, what then? 

You’ve been married for years, you’ve tried your best, given it your all, but you can’t continue living like this. It’s time to call it a day. You break the news to your partner who begs you to stay, but your mind is made up. There are tears from both sides and then it starts, the name-calling, the friends that won’t return your calls, the bitterness, the end.

You both then find new partners, loving partners and you couldn’t be happier, but what if you both live the rest of your life alone? Can you forgive and forget?

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Change is happening, every day, all over the world. In fact, every day brings with it new opportunities for change. But whether we realise it or not, change is happening. It’s happening in our towns with new developments, in science, in technology, in our heads and in our businesses. It’s the one constant that we have in our lives. We see it in the seasons, through fashion, food choices and even what’s on TV. We can choose to move with the times and embrace change or continue to fight against it.

If we only ever forgive and forget when change works in our favour, what do we do when it doesn’t?

Top Tips

  • Live in the now. Try it, how do you feel right here, right now?

  • It’s all about mindset. Change will be as hard as you think it is.

  • Accept that change needs to happen. Or we would all still be living in caves.

  • Look for the positives in each situation. There will be some even if it doesn’t feel like it.

  • Realise that you have a choice. You can choose to forgive and forget, or you can stay stuck in the past.

Author of this article:
Kelly Swingler, Founder at Chrysalis Consulting is currently undertaking a PhD in Organisational Change and the Courage of Leaders. Kelly has a strong background in HR; having worked in the industry for 18 years she is a qualified and accredited Executive Coach and lives in the UK.  Kelly can be contacted at Chrysalis consulting

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